[Chris McKinley]

What are your top ten reasons why you still suck after all that time spent training?

[Tao Joannes]

10) Not enough cardio
9) Too much ego
Too much weed
7) Not enough sparring
6) The sun was in my eyes
5) The rules are too restrictive
4) Your momma stole all my jing last night
3) My back hurts from too much time in the chair
2) Too much ego
1) Emptyflower weakened my soul

[brett]

I don't have enough money to buy the teacher certificate.

[Uatu the Watcher the Ed]

#1: See Obed Marsh's reason
#2: Never was an athlete anyway...
#3: Sigh...

[qiphlow]

it's my parents' fault.

[brett]

Oh, you wanted ten...
2. My enormous penis kept getting in the way
3. I kept getting my qi stolen from jealous classmates that didn't like that I got the real transmissions
4. I was being taught an external art in my sleep from another master, and the external kept me from getting the internal when I trained awake
5. My teacher told me that he could tell that I had 1000 years of power, and so he held back so I didn't hurt anyone.
6. Every time I walked I would break the tiles in my kitchen, so I had to stop training so hard
7. I heard tai chi made you gay
8. My teacher taught me wrong as a joke
9. I got into this to stop that girl from beating me up and stealing my lunch money, and after I got good enough to do that, I lost my motivation.
10. because my girlfriend likes it when I go down on her. (re-read the question and think about it)

[Arthur Watley]

1. I lied about my training regimen.
2. Shifu hasn't opened up my small heavenly circulation yet.
3. I have to work, and I have this crick in my neck, and besides I already trained today, and next time for sure man.
4. I'm actually a fat old man hiding behind a computer.
5. I'm a seminar-junkie. I go to seminars because it's the only way people will talk to me. At seminars I laugh too loud at things that aren't funny.
6. I don't need to be good, because my teacher is better than your teacher, and my lineage is more pure.
7. I train more with WLOs (weapon-like objects) such as fans, deerhorn knives and floppy swords than real weapons.
8. I get offended when people touch my face. DON'T TOUCH MY FACE! I also display numerous idiosyncratic reactions to being touched elsewhere, such as my wrists or hips or the back of my head. THOSE ARE MY NO-NO ZONES! Please respect that.
9. Nobody wants to roll with me because I don't understand basic hygiene, e.g. toe cheese, halitosis, armpit fungi, skidmarks...
10. Nobody wants to roll with me because I'm only here for a good letch.

[Arthur Watley]

For serious:

1. I don't train directly with masters.
2. I don't have enough time to train, due to being a wage-slave.
3. I don't put myself out there enough in terms of sparring with people who are downright scary.
4. I live in a safe city.
5. I need more/better training partners.
6. I don't train enough (professionalism; frequency) with weapons.

I plan to remedy all of that.

[mix]

1) I'm lazy
2) I like to make excuses
3) I don't have enough willing practice partners (see, excuses already)
4) I don't train smart enough
5) I'm still a beginner
6) Uhh, cant think of anything else right now. More later maybe.

[mix]

Oooh, how could I forget.

"you suck, suck it hard, go down baby. You suck, suck it hard and move your tongue around. I know your real proud cause you think your well hung, but I think its time to learn how to use your tongue. You say you want things to be even and you want things to be fair, but your afraid to get your teach caught in my pubic hair. Now you suck!"-Yeasty girls

[mix]

Nancy, there's no need to derail the thread.

Sorry boss, it just seemed appropriate

[Chris McKinley]

Yeah, um........yeah.



BTW, a Santa Cthulhu plushie is probably just about the coolest Christmas present anybody could ever receive.

www.cthulhufhtagn2008.com

This post has been edited by Chris McKinley: 04 January 2008 - 11:28 PM

[Tao Joannes]

Chris didn't post his reasons...hmmm

I guess his list would simply read.

"Because I like the taste."

[Uatu the Watcher the Ed]

Oh, yeah...

#4: My ancestors were landowners

[Ian C Kuzushi]

1 I am not willing to give up comforts like having a couple of scotches before bed.

2 I don't go outside my comfort zone enough

3 I eat healthy but way too much.

I also don't really think I suck, I could just be so much better than I am.